February 25, 2010
The Perfect Gift Combo for a Hopeless Bachelor
We all have a friend who is completely inept in the kitchen. Actually, if you don’t have a friend like that, read on, because I have enough friends who meet that description to share at least one of mine with you.
The gift suggestion that I’m about to make for him is a tad expensive, so be prepared. I assure you, though, that you will discover it’s a very good investment on your part. Perhaps that nameless fellow is your roommate, your cousin or even your own son who you can seem to get to move out of your house.
Try giving him a romantic dinner without having to leave the house or apartment. Hopefully he’ll be able to find some date with whom to share it. Let’s face it, nothing sweeps a potential partner off his or her feet quite like a private, romantic, dinner at the host’s home. Now, the friend I’m thinking of needs all the help he can get in this regard. You may need to be very specific when you give him your gift and the instructions to go with it. Remind him to light candles, choose the music for him and suggest he pick up his dirty socks.
Start with a gift of a selection of gourmet cheeses for the beginning course Suggest that he consider serving the cheese with ripe apple slices or pear slices, but only if you trust him to handle a knife. He can serve this course as a finger food or at the dining table as the formal beginning of the meal.
The second course should be a delicious gourmet dinner of lobster or perhaps a surf and turf meal, if he is a beef fan. Since this man needs so much help, you will want to be certain that the lobster is as fresh as possible.
Tell him to cap off the evening with a magnificent, gourmet turtle cheesecake. Or, if he does not like chocolate, then select the more traditional New York cheesecake, decorated with a sprig of fresh mint.
You might also recommend a fine wine, if he consumes alcoholic beverages. Lobster is very hearty fare, so don’t be afraid to suggest he pair it with a bold wine such as a Merlot or even a Burgundy.
Now, sit back and wait for the eventually arriving wedding invitation. If it doesn’t arrive within six months, just find another friend. That will be much easier.
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February 17, 2010
My Favorite Gift to Give Is Food
I have to admit, I am not a shopping enthusiast. Except around the winter holidays, I hate the parking problems, I don’t enjoy browsing aisle after aisle looking for something that would be just perfect for Grandma or Uncle Arthur. I certainly do not like waiting on line with frustrated people killing time for the lone employee to handle a complicated exchange. During the holidays, I enjoy strolling through stores just people watching, without being weighted down with packages. The experience for some reason puts me into a holiday mood, but I do my actual shopping and buying almost entirely online. That’s a practice I developed in the very early years of the Web.
Online shopping didn’t save my life all by itself. Just because I started using the Web before any of my friends, I still had to make the decisions. And then, around five years ago, or so, I discovered food.
That wasn’t very honestly phrased, because I discovered food when I was still an infant. But I didn’t discover food as a gift idea until recently. You see, at that time I received a gift basket full of hardly edible sausages, processed cheese spreads (mostly chemicals I think) and crackers that were about as crunchy as a rock. However, the poor quality of what passed as food in that gift turned out to be my inspiration. “What,” I thought, “If I had received genuinely good food?” How different that would have been, and how much I would have enjoyed it.
Since then, I have been busy conducting research (that’s just my word for “sampling”). I have found online vendors who offer genuine quality for about the same price that you can get that synthetic stuff at the mall. (You know the one I mean, but I’m not about to open myself to a libel or slander charge by naming the brand.) Just like the mall kiosks, the online shops handle all the shipping, gift cards, everything. I know that my gifts will be exceptionally pleasant surprises for all of my gift recipients.
These Internet shops offer everything from gourmet fruit baskets to live lobster dinners (well, they won’t be alive when they are actually eaten), from wine gift baskets to cookie bouquets. The array of gift foods is really quite amazing.
I do keep gift foods around the house, beautifully or cleverly arranged, for my guests who come to my house or for those whom I visit in person during those gift giving times. The Internet provides assistance to me even in these cases, because it is packed full of great ideas for arranging and wrapping gift food.
If you happen to see me strolling a store aisle with a huge smile on my face when everybody else seems frantic, you will now know how I can be cheerful when surrounded by panic. But don’t tell my Uncle Arthur.